Are you ready to learn why I was in the hospital?

I've been waiting to make sure I had no complications, because it would be quite embarrassing to tell people what a walk-in-the-park this particular surgery was, and then have something go wrong.

I never thought I'd be using a plastic surgeon. And my insurance paid for it all.

I had a bi-lateral mammoplasty; in other words, a breast reduction.

Now when I told people about this, most everybody said, "I didn't think you were that big."

Gee, thanks. I was into a size "G" bra. I'm a big gal, so being generously endowed didn't look out of place on me. The size alone was no problem, but aging had taken everything south. I could not get comfortable. If I wore a good, supportive bra, those plastic inserts cut into my ribs and hurt. The straps hurt my shoulders.

We won't even talk about the discomforts of going braless.

So I did some Internet research and found out that usually, insurance will pay for this. I had a few email conversations with a friend of my daughter who had this procedure done when she was in her thirties; she says it's the best thing she ever did.

The surgery took four hours. Not only was I not nervous, I was anxious to have it done. When the anesthesia guy said he'd get me some Versed (whatever that is) before surgery, I turned him down, although someone else later insisted I have it.

Cliff, on the other hand, was a wreck, bless his heart. I know he hated to see "the girls" trimming down, but he understood.

This is a pretty personal subject, and ordinarily I wouldn't be telling the world about it. But there might be another lady who just can't get comfortable, someone who doesn't know insurance will pay for this.

So there you have it.

I spent one night in the hospital. They sent me home with antibiotics. Oh, and hydrocodone, which I'll save for those days when my knees are really bothering me. I took one dose the second day after surgery for the sore throat I got from having that breathing device in place while they operated. Otherwise, I really haven't needed anything for pain. I'm not supposed to lift more than ten pounds for a couple of weeks: of course I've forgotten a dozen times and picked up things I shouldn't have... my thirty-pound dog, for instance.

If you're not squeamish, you can search on Youtube and see a video of the operation like the one I had. I'm glad I didn't watch until after my surgery; I might have chickened out.

Questions?

Oh, I have to tell you about this: When I opened Cliff's lunch box this morning, there was a sympathy card a couple of co-workers had given him. The verse on the front reads as follows:

The ones that we've lost

still go with us in spirit

we will remember them.

In the faces of family,

their presence still lingers...

we will remember them.

Hello, people? They're not gone, they're just smaller!