I've always appreciated him and loved him or I wouldn't have been here all these years. But lately I think about all the widows there are around me, living alone, and I count my blessings.
Several of my cousins no longer have their husbands with them. My husband has been close to death twice: his open heart surgery... the cardiologist said he wouldn't even recommend that Cliff drive the mile or two from his office to the nearest hospital, and made him take an ambulance. There was also the time his gall bladder sort of exploded and put little stones all through his body. He was in the hospital ten days for that, and came home with two tubes coming out of his belly and chest. His doctor told me he could have died.
But here he is, soundly sleeping in the bedroom while I spend my morning alone time on the computer.
I am a loner, always have been. Cliff used to tell me I really didn't need anybody. He figured I'd never miss him when he died. But really, it's because I AM a loner that I need him, because he knows how to deal with me.
Getting old isn't much fun, but it has made us appreciate one another more each day. And that's a good thing.
Now I realize why I always loved the words in September Song.
… Oh, it's a long, long while from May to DecemberBut the days grow shortWhen you reach SeptemberWhen the Autumn weather turns the leaves to flameOne hasn't got time for the waiting game
… Oh, the days dwindle down to a precious fewSeptember, NovemberAnd these few precious daysI'll spend with youThese precious daysI'll spend with you
I am so glad my husband is still with me.
Aging is certainly a double edges sword. You get to live long enough to experience lots of grandchildren and great grandchildren. But you also reach a point where all your family is gone and you are alone in this world. I saw it many times in my grandma who finally passed away last fall how sad and alone she felt at times with all her friends and family gone and even her daughter, my mom, also gone. I would love to peek in on the reunion above that is surely still going on though I think I'll wait for awhile and enjoy what I still have down here.
ReplyDeleteI really thought I'd adjust easily when Larry passed. How foolish I was. I used to live and
ReplyDeletenow I exist. There's a big difference. Glad you are still two!
I'm glad you're thankful, Donna. Some only realize how lucky they are when the spouse is gone. One partner will go before the other and it's usually the husband.
ReplyDelete