Wednesday, January 30, 2008

The grandson

Perhaps the previous entry seemed as though I was complaining about the grandson; I was not. I don't mind having him here.

He had some issues in his life last spring (involving a female) and needed a place to stay. In June, I told him he could crash here until the end of July; that would give him time to save up some money for a place to live. I gave him few rules: 1. Don't expect me to cook for you. (Cliff works evenings, so our main meal is at noon... grandson worked days at that time). 2. Give me $25 a week, mainly as a token so I don't feel too taken advantage of. 3. Save some money. I don't intend to let you live here just so you can party away your paycheck.

Except for some incidents when he was seemingly trying to tear up the pickup we co-signed for (he's always made his payments regularly), things went fine. So when his deadline rolled around, I told him he could stick around longer.

Actually, I don't see him that much. Weekends he goes someplace (I don't ask; he's twenty-two years old, and I told him when he came here that he didn't have to report in).

I did add one more rule when he started looking on Craigslist for a motorcycle: No motorcycle while you're living here, unless it's a dirt bike. For one thing, such a purchase would eat up his savings, and I want him to have that on hand to secure a place of his own in the future. But mainly, I don't want to have to worry about him.

Since Cliff and I have a motorcycle, this may seem hypocritical. But I know how recklessly young men drive; add to this the fact that the grandson only has vision in one eye. I just don't need the worry. I told him he's welcome to move out and buy anything he wants. I won't worry so much then, because I won't know each time he's out on his bike. He commented that he doesn't have the money to move out and get a motorcycle. Well then, my boy, keep saving your money.

He's had some job problems, and had to work at two part-time jobs lately to stay afloat. But he's saved up a tidy nest egg, and is still adding to it (not that he has a choice).

Next week he'll start a new job, one that eventually should pay quite well.

He's learned a lot in the past few months: 1. Women can't always be trusted to be faithful. 2. Sometimes you have to work two jobs to make ends meet. 3. It's a good feeling to have money in savings, even if you've been forced by Grandma to put it there. 4. Home is the place where, when you have to go there, they have to take you in (thanks to Robert Frost for that one).

That latter reminds me of a time when Grandson was about four years old and was visiting here. I was upstairs laying in bed planning on taking a nap; he climbed the stairs, snuggled down beside me and said, "Home sweet Grandma's home."

He has some credit issues I'd really like to see resolved, but I'm not forcing him to fix them. Sometimes young people are better off without being able to secure credit. They can't go out and get themselves in debt over their heads that way!

So that's the story on the grandson. Lately, he's done a fine job of staying out of trouble... so far as I know.

And what I don't know, won't hurt me.


Janet said...

what a good grandma you are!

Midlife Mom said...

Great posts! You are teaching your grandson some very valuable lessons that will serve him well his whole life! Good job Gramma!

Also your post on your dogs was so good although I got a little teary when you lost the one that got hit. Glad you found one that has worked out so well for you, they are such good companions!

Well we are off to the sunny south tomorrow. Please pray for good traveling weather for us! Thanks!

Glo said...

Great post...If only more parents and grandparents would set rules like these we'd all be better off.

BarnGoddess said...

One thing I bet on:

He's gonna look back one day and know youve set him up to be a success in life!

You are a great Grandma.