Wednesday, December 04, 2019

The ups and downs of my day

If you follow this mess I call a blog, you probably know I'm a bit emotional these days.  I'll have two or three days where I keep my mind off things, then a day will come when I can't stop thinking about somebody else's troubles.  Thank goodness I can walk in the pasture these days, because that's the best thing for the wintertime blahs.  Feeling the cool breeze on my face, walking over still-green grass and cushiony leaves, seeing the clouds in the blue sky:  sunshine, as well as the open air, is restorative.  I remind myself often as I walk to let worries drop away and just be present there in the thick of nature.  Otherwise my time would be wasted.  

During deer season Gabe and I walked along the highway in front of our house until we got to the park on the edge of town, then we'd walk around the park awhile.  Because there were people hunting on our property, I didn't think it was safe for us to walk there; besides, Gabe and I might have scared the deer away from the hunters, walking through the woods.  However, it was a relief when deer season ended.  

I had to be alert and watch for cars coming, which is something I'm not used to.  Then on the last day I tried to walk along the highway, a pit bull came running at us.  When I saw him coming, I picked Gabe up fast, because a larger dog will often attack small prey.  I did fear for my own safety, but I needn't have been concerned about that:  Silly dog frolicked all around me merrily. I intended to keep walking to the park, but I finally realized this dog wasn't going to go back home.  The worst part was that he kept bounding across the highway in front of cars, which could have caused people to veer off the road toward me and my dog!  Finally, still carrying my 18-pound Schnauzer, I turned and went home.  You'd be surprised how heavy Gabe felt by the time we got back home (with the pit bull still following us).

Our weather is lovely this week, with sunny skies and mild temperatures for December.  I went out to walk with Gabe around nine this morning with my coat unzipped and open.  As we turned to walk down our first and steepest hill, I stopped to take a picture of our shadows.
After our walk was over, the day began to degenerate.  Well, I guess that isn't true, because the day was still lovely; my mood is what went downhill.   

I needed a haircut, but I couldn't contact my hairdresser, Connie, who works out of her home, because her cell number was on my old phone but not my current one.  I eventually recalled the hairdresser mentioning another local lady whose hair she cuts.  I looked the lady up on Facebook and messaged her to get Connie's number.  So I did get my hair cut, and it looks just fine, thank you very much!

Anyway, that issue was bothering me for most of the morning.  Then I decided to set up my new printer.  Some of my worst memories are of experiences with the various printers I've owned; when I read online reviews of printers, one of the most common phrases I see is this:  "Makes a nice doorstop after it quits working."  And so far, it seems I have myself a brand new doorstop.

I gave it half a dozen tries.  At one point I was sure I had it, but I was wrong.  Honestly, I'm so moody lately I could have easily cried about it, but I just shrunk into myself and watched the last trace of joy go out the door.  

Pathetic, I know.  I kept the box this impossible printer came in, and if I have to return it, I will.  On the positive side, it only cost $20, so if they won't take it back I'm not out much.  

When I look back at these words I just typed, I realize what an insignificant problem this is.  And here I am inflicting my pitiful whining on my readers.  In fact, what I've written here is so ridiculous, I can almost laugh at myself now.  I make fun of people who take this attitude, and now I'm doing it!

As far as I know I don't have cancer.  We keep our bills paid.  We have plenty to eat and a roof over our heads.  I have a dog beside me who makes me feel better when I'm down.  And I am loved;  Cliff always has my back and keeps me out of trouble.  My stomach is behaving itself.  

Now I sit here thinking, Do I really want to post this mess?  I usually try to present the positive side of things, rather than whining.  

I guess I will post it just so you know I am capable of whining.  Tomorrow is a new day and if I can't post something worthwhile, I will keep my silence.   

Yours anyhow,
Donna

 















   

7 comments:

Margaret said...

We all have these down moments. I was overwhelmed (and still am) by how close Christmas is to Thanksgiving this year. I feel like I can't measure up to my own (or society's?) expectations for the holidays, and the joys of the season. I struggle this time of year anyway, so I'm giving myself permission to vent on the blog. It's good to know that others have those times too. xoxo

Margie's Musings said...

I agree with Margaret, Donna. I have had those "down" moments too from time to time but I just keep reminding myself how lucky I am to have good health at 84 and to have good friends who love me. I actually don't have a thing to gripe about but sometimes I do anyhow.

I will put you in my prayers. Knowing someone cares often helps!

Jean said...

We all have our ups and downs maybe putting your feelings on your blog will help. I look forward to reading it. Just take care. Jean

Jon said...

This post was enjoyable, Donna - and you didn't whine at all. I'm presently having so MANY problems (everything happens at once) that I'm hesitant to write a blog post. It would depress the hell out of everyone.

The incident with the pit bull was scary, but I'm glad he was friendly. When I lived in Texas my neighbor had 5 pit bulls.

I really like your shadow photo.

TARYTERRE said...

love the photo of you and your shadow. " mama said there'd be days like this." just take 'em one at a time. all you can do.

The Feminine Energy said...

Awwwww Donna, never feel bad about posting when your mood isn't all sparkles & joy! If all you posted was cheer, none of us would think you're being honest. Truth be known life's hard for all of us, off and on, and you don't have to be homeless & in the gutter to feel that way. I've been out-of-sorts too. It seems day after day the minor irritations send me into the stratosphere. *sigh* Well, all we can do is put one foot in front of the other and keep moving forward. I sooooooo agree with you that being out in nature helps so much. Hang in there, kiddo. If you do, I will too. Love, Andrea xoxo

Lori said...

I actually like to read posts like this -- not that you're having a bad day or feeling a bit down or have something that is worrying you, of course. But even with a post that you feel is you "whining" it is still a beautiful post and so you -- your loveliness comes through! You are real, honest, and just like the rest of us. And it is nice that you feel like you are able to post when you're having a down day as well as the up days.