I have a few hours alone

 Cliff and his brother are on their way to Craig, Missouri, to (probably) buy a loader for Phil's tractor.  Cliff is going to have to do some things to make the loader fit on Phil's tractor, which should keep him busy for awhile, perhaps, on another day.  People used to tell me I'd be seeing more of Cliff than I really wanted to after he retired, and I argued with them, telling them how busy he stayed in the shop.  The truth is I never felt the four walls closing in on me until the Virus arrived.  That shouldn't have made a difference, since he does a lot of couch-sitting anyhow, and he's earned the right to sit.  All I know is that I definitely feel like I need more alone time these days.  Bless his heart, some afternoons he'll go to the shop to just sit and listen to his country music so I'll have an hour alone, which makes me feel guilty even though I didn't suggest he go out there.  

I don't want anybody thinking I'm putting my husband down:  This is his house as much as mine, considering he paid for it; he shouldn't be required to leave at the whims of his wife.  I'm not saying that just because he reads my blog.  People who are married to introverts have a rough way to go in life, and Cliff copes the best he can.  Ideally I'd have an outbuilding behind the house close enough to get Internet, with a comfy chair and a milk house heater to warm it in winter when I needed some space.  Then I'd be the one to leave the house for awhile instead of him.  

I have trouble reading a book or doing a blog entry when Cliff's in the house, simply because he and I converse often, a conversation that never really ends, but simply takes long pauses, then begins again later in the day.  We look at our computers and sometimes tell one another what we just found online.  The other day I went out to the swing to compose my blog entry, and he realized I was looking for some hard-to-find quiet space and went to the shop, although I hadn't told him my reason for going out.  It just seems that when I'm in the house, I'll get the thoughts flowing and then Cliff starts telling me something and next thing you know, I've lost my traction on the blog entry.  It's the same with reading a book; I just can't tune out the TV or radio or conversation.  I can only concentrate when there's no distraction.

On another note:  I have a friends in Kentucky; I first "met" the lady in the AOL Christian chat room where I made so many good friends I later met in person.  Cliff took me to Texas for my first "chat room reunion" and I met Ora and her husband.  Cliff didn't want to go.  A lady in Arkansas had told me I could ride to Texas with her.  However, I had not met Lona "in real life", and Cliff was convinced she was actually a man trying to trick me into meeting him so he could.... well, you fill in the blanks.  My husband couldn't believe he drove clear to Texas to protect me from an innocent bunch of Christians over fifty.  There may have been a strange person or two in the group (I recall a lady who wore a chicken hat most of the time she visited with us at the Texas reunion), but for the most part, they were cream-of-the-crop people.  

Ora and her husband live next door to their daughter and her family.  The daughter caught Covid-19 a few months ago (not really sure of when), was in the hospital a long time, and is home, but still not back to normal.  Here's a strange thing:  Both Ora and her husband tested positive for the virus but have never had so much as a sniffle or sneeze.  No symptoms at all, and they are at an age to be high-risk.  

Yesterday her daughter, who I would guess is middle-aged, was on my mind, so I asked about her.  Here's what she messaged back:  "Amy is doing well. She has her good days, then other days she hides from the world in her bedroom. She is on steroids and lung meds. She has a hard time socializing, she is afraid. She has bad dreams at times about dying. But we have assured her she is fine, that just having the virus is not the full story. It is for the rest of her life. She got slammed big time."

You see, I only know of one person in or near my Lafayette County circle who had the disease, so it's a shock to read about the serious and fatal cases across the country, especially if it's someone you know. It reminds me that Cliff and I do take some risks when we socialize with our families, although I don't intend to stop doing it. The grandson lives right next door and goes to work five days a week at a place that probably has two- or three-hundred employees with only one possible case of the virus. They wear masks all day. My son-in-law works at the same place. My daughter is back to working away from home, so she's a risk too, as is Cora when she visits. We haven't quarantined properly since the first month of this mess. Yes, we are at risk and will continue to be. We don't go where there are big crowds, we wear masks in stores even if they aren't mandated. That's about the extent of our quarantine. If we get this virus, you could almost say we asked for it.  

We live in a rural county where it seems at least half the cases of Covid take place in nursing homes and jails. We've stopped going to the city to Costco because they are out of a lot of the stuff I want to buy these days. I really wanted to give some business to the two closest stores to us during this time, but neither of them have good produce; they let it get old and tired, so you pay the price and come home with soft grapes and wilted lettuce; they also don't have much variety, although that alone wouldn't stop me from shopping there. I won't buy ice cream at the store in Lexington because two different times I've come home with frostbit ice cream. I guess Oak Grove Walmart will be my store in the future, and it's fifteen miles one way to get there.

We are now almost to the point of buying all our meat, after so many years of plenty, but the prices are getting down where they should be, at least occasionally. Ground beef is what we use most, and I will soon be buying some.

And that's about all I have to say today.

Peace.