Not everybody will have a merry Christmas

I'm not big on Christmas any more; it's a great time to be a child, but I just try not to be a grinch while waiting for it to be over.  I count my blessings daily, and my needs are met, but honestly, I could do without Christmas these days.  I know how lucky I am to have my husband with me at Christmas.  

Cliff has a cousin, Edna, that I've grown close to over the years.  She had to be put in a nursing home in the Ozarks due to covid, and came close to dying.  Her son Mike, who lives in Indiana, went to see her and wasn't happy with her level of care or her condition, so he loaded her up in his car and put her in a nice rest home near his home, visiting her every single day.  He got her a device that let her call me on Facebook Messenger, and for a while she'd call me every day.  She told me the same things each day, because she had some dementia, but I just let her talk.  I'm sure we talked half an hour or more, some days.

Meanwhile, Mike's oldest sister got Covid for the second time and was almost at death's door.  A relative in the Ozarks died (from covid), so he drove to the funeral to take his mother, who was doing much better at this point at the new facility.  While there, he visited his sister in the hospital, saw she wasn't doing well at all, and put her in the car and took her back home with him, to stay with him and his wife, Janice.

For the last month or so, Edna hadn't called me on Messenger.  I just assumed she had forgotten about me, and I hated to call her for fear the timing would be wrong.  It's a different time zone and I didn't want to call around meal time, bath time, and so forth.

I never knew Mike.  I met him as a child a some fifty years ago, and then once at an anniversary party for his parents; but I certainly didn't know him at all.  Now I've seen how he loves and helps his family, so I have a great respect for him.  I told him once on Messenger what a wonderful son and brother he is, and he replied, "Family is what it's all about." 

So imagine my sadness at his message to me this morning.  

Hi Donna. Hope Cliff is doing good with his hearing. Haven't given you an update lately. Mom's dementia has taken a nose dive. She was in the hospital for a couple weeks. She's back in the nursing home in physical, speech and occupational therapy. She is being very combative with the nurses. Janice and I were with her a couple days before she went to the hospital. I'll just say it was bad. If she doesn't do well by Wednesday they are going to get Hospice to come in and help to try to give her a little quality of life.  Same time Mom was in the hospital I tested positive. My wife had a heart attack and covid. She went in on the 22nd of Nov. She passed away this morning.  It's been a hard year.

I'm sure any prayers for this man would be appreciated.  He has been through so much pain and sorrow.

Count your blessings!

Facebook played tricks on me

When covid first came on the scene in 2020, Facebook became a pit of vipers for me.  Suddenly people were arguing about what was true and what wasn't, the right wing folks being especially pushy.  Everyone is entitled to his or her opinion, but they wouldn't let the other side have a different opinion... at ALL.  I never tried to argue with any of them myself, but I let it bother me, and I went a little crazy.  I went to my nurse-practitioner at the clinic and told her I thought I was getting dementia; she questioned me for quite a while and said, "Most people get a little forgetful as they age, but I don't think you have dementia.  I think you  have depression."

Of course all this took place in winter, and I have always had some winter depression; I guess all the fuss on Facebook made it worse.  I ended up getting a prescription for depression which has helped me every since:  if you don't believe me, ask my husband!  It isn't a "happy pill" that would work as a street drug, at least I wouldn't think so; it just keeps me on an even keel, and my winter depression has faded into the background.

I didn't want to leave Facebook back then, but I made some changes.  I stopped following all the people who constantly posted their opinions (some even sent me private messages, but I found you can shut them out of Messenger).  They were still Facebook friends, but I wouldn't be seeing them unless I actually went to their pages.  That also helped immensely.  Of course, Facebook got pretty boring, with so many friends unfollowed, but it helped.

For the last six months or so, I haven't been seeing many of my friends; I'd just see a few of them, the same posts over and over.  I first noticed my friend Jessica wasn't showing up on my feed and hadn't for awhile.  She was one of my favorite people when I worked at Kohls and I want to keep in touch with her.  I knew very well that I hadn't unfollowed her, because she's too smart to be spreading hate and discord on Facebook.  I checked:  Lo and behold, she was somehow unfollowed, and I know I didn't do it.

Finally, being so tired of seeing the same posts day after day from a very small group of my friends, I decided I'd better see just who I was following and who I wasn't.

Good grief, most of them were unfollowed, and they were not among the trouble-makers at all!  I spent about thirty minutes going down the list of my friends and "following" them again.  Apparently Facebook messed with something and decided to make me unfollow most everybody there.  I need to go back and fix some more, because I got weary of fixing the list and stopped for awhile yesterday.

So I have most of my people showing up now.  Whew!

On another note:  I have a blogger friend, Margaret, who is also on Facebook.  She ordered herself some socks for Christmas.  Bomba socks, to be exact.  I had never heard of such a brand, but some of her friends commented about the glorious comfort of Bomba socks.  I googled Bomba; because it's the gifting season, they had 40% off.  That didn't make them cheap.  Still, I wanted to try them.  I argued with myself, reminding myself that I only wear socks for 5 or 6 months of the year.  I looked over the website and found that for every pair of socks they sell, they donate a pair of the same socks to charity.  If for any reason you don't like them, you can return them and get your money back.

So I got a package of four, and they didn't arrive in a timely manner.  I emailed Bomba to see what happened; the next day I received their response:  They were sending me another package of four, and if the first ones arrived, I could keep both orders;  I did receive both, making my eight pairs of socks quite a bargain after all.  If any  of my big-footed relatives would like a pair, I'd gladly give them one.  I don't want to take these off, they're so warm and comfy!  Margaret, I know you'll be reading this.  I love these socks, and I'm glad you and your friends introduced me to them.  Until now, I wondered what the big deal was about a pair of socks.

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