Trying to figure this out

Most of my blog entries show me that nobody Facebooked or tweeted them.  I've gone for days with nary a tweet on anything.  Not that I am surprised by that, since honestly there isn't much on this blog that is tweet-worthy.  
But my goodness, let me do what I consider a pretty boring entry about church attendance and I am FAMOUS.  
OK, maybe not famous, but the entry I did yesterday already has had one tweet and six Facebook shares.  It was pretty much the same with all the entries I did on the subject of attending church.  
Just something to add to the list of things that make me go "Hmmmm".    

Church attendance (my final entry on the subject)

If you go to Google and type in "Why don't people go to church any more", you'll see plenty of reasons, so there's no use in my wasting time and Internet space on the subject.  The church, as many people pointed out, is not the building; it's the people.  So the correct wording would be, "Why don't I go meet with the church?"  
I'm adding a link to another blog because I think it's relavent.  Sorry I added it after several people already read this entry, but that's how I often do my entries... hit or miss.  Click HERE.
Read the comments on all my entries on this topic and you will see some real people's ideas on the subject.  Here are my own ideas: 
The decline in church attendance is most apparent in small-town communities.  These churches weren't all that big to start with, so it hurts when when people drop out.  I think in small congregations, part of the trouble is that the people know one another so well.  Let one person offend another, and somebody leaves, taking his family with him.  I've seen this happen all too often. 
Young people seem to be less interested in church attendance than older folks; Go visit any church, especially the smaller congregations, and look around:  there are lots of gray heads in the crowd, aren't there?  
In most young families these days, the husband and wife both hold down jobs, and usually spend a lot of driving time on the road.  They are carting the babies off to babysitters, so they only get a couple of hours each evening with their kids before they send them off to bed.  On the weekend they're doing the grocery shopping and house-cleaning and laundry:  it's hard to stop everything, get everybody bathed and dressed, and head to church services.  The ones who do go to church will often choose to drive farther in order to find a church that has activities for children and young people, which means they will probably find a larger congregation.  The smaller churches just can't compete, although I've seen some of them try.  It never works.  Hiring a youth minister for the two teenagers attending your church doesn't seem to make other young people come to church.  
My daughter mentioned the problem of churches trying to force people to help in their nurseries:  There is a very simple solution for this, the one I grew up with.  When a church building was erected, they would put a sound-proof room in the back of the sanctuary with a plate-glass window looking out over the congregation.  The sound of the service was piped into that room.  It was equipped with changing tables, a crib or two, and lots of rocking chairs.  When your baby got fussy, you took him to the "cry room", and you'd take care of your own baby.  You rocked him, fed him, or changed him, while listening to the sermon or hymns.  If he settled down or went to sleep in your arms, you rejoined the congregation.  
Isn't that simple?  
So now we get down to this question:  Why don't I go to church regularly?  
Laziness, perhaps?  It's easier to stay home.  It isn't that I sleep in; I'm usually out of bed by 5 A.M. every day; it's just easier to stay here with my television, my Nook, and my computer.  Me, me, me.  It's all about me.  
And then there's this:  I'm not much of a people person.  What if I get to know these folks and they figure out how strange I am?  I'm always putting my foot in my mouth.  If they REALLY knew me, they probably wouldn't like me.  This, I believe, is why many people prefer to go to a large church where they can slip in and slip out.  If you regularly attend a small church, you are going to have to talk to some people and get to know them and they are going to figure you out, for better or worse.    
Looking back over the years, I can honestly tell you that I was always a better person when I attended church regularly.  I spent more time "sweeping around my own back door" and less time criticizing the neighbors.  I was more giving, less stingy.  I smiled more, I sang around the house more.   
Like many people, I have a problem with a church that doesn't want me unless I give a certain amount of money.  Not all churches are like that, just so you know.  It wasn't that way where my family attended church when I was a kid.  A few years ago I attended a small, country church where they didn't take up a collection at all:  There was a box at the back of the auditorium and you put your money in there on your way out, if you so desired.  

Surfing the Internet as I do, I read a lot of blogs.  I've run into several atheists on my Internet travels and have come to this conclusion:  The really vocal atheists are the angriest, most hateful bunch of people I've encountered.  They don't seem happy.  They aren't thankful for the good things they have (of course, who would they thank?).  They bash Christians for no apparent reason.  If I were an atheist, which I am not and never will be, I would just pat the silly little Christians on their empty little heads (if that's how I felt about them) and leave them alone.  
But that's just me.  
I'm done with this subject, because any further words of mine would be like beating a dead horse.  However, I will still take guest entries from anyone who would like to add something to the topic.  I cannot emphasize strongly enough to READ THE COMMENTS, because there's some good discussion going on there.       

Third in a series on Church attendance from someone who attends (guest post)

One of Cliff's relatives wanted to tell us how she feels about church attendance.  By the way, Angela has a blog of her own if you'd like to check it out.  Just click HERE.  She's an excellant writer; I'm waiting for the day she publishes a book.

Why I Go To Church

I go to church simply because I want to, not because I have to. For me, there really is a big difference. I use to be a part of the have-to crowd… that somehow God was keeping score on me and the blessings in my life would depend on my attendance record for the month and whether or not I read my Sunday school lesson for the week. I quickly (or not so quickly) learned, however, that I could do everything right and still not feel like I was quite up to par. Of course, that’s how some people want it. Some congregations can be more brutal and more competitive than the stereotypical lunch table in a junior high cafeteria.

Even so, I treasure the whole Sunday experience thing. Granted, we are in a church now that I can relate to: the songs are my grandma’s songs (Victory in Jesus, Unclouded Day), the congregation is mixed (from what they wear to where they are from), and the pastor is someone who has not been spoon-fed the Bible his entire life (not that I’m knocking the man who has known and lived his calling since the age of three, but it’s refreshing to hear someone in their 60s say from the pulpit I have been where you’ve been!). Is it about entertainment? Sometimes, yes. Does that make it more real? Most of the time, no. I am a firm believer that all that entertainment can very easily confuse the real message.

I am reminded of a woman whom I know who dances for a living (and I don’t mean the ballet either). She very enthusiastically gushed to me one day the attributes of a new church she was attending, “I love it! It’s like being at a club!” Or I think about youth groups that entice young people to attend based on themes taken straight from Hollywood. I’ve seen more than one kid disillusioned based on the raw hamburger they were encouraged to eat (Fear Factor) or the strange rap song they were admonished for not singing along with (American Idol). Just because we put the name of Jesus in neon lights or squeeze His Name into the chorus of a song does not make it all about Jesus. Lives aren’t transformed because the three-point sermon was so brilliantly spoken or the nice people at the tape table accepted our money with a “Bless You, Sister.” Lives are changed when Jesus becomes more real than the fog machines and spotlights and color-coordinated praise teams.

My living room holds none of those show-stopper entertainment gadgets and my closet is severely lacking in color-coordinating anything (that fits anyway); but my Bible sits to the left of me yearning to be read and my spirit knows that God is with me whether I kneel before him at a church altar in trendy black heels or lock myself in the bathroom with desperate petitions pouring from my heart and soiled slippers on my feet. I don’t need a church building to worship a God in Whom I firmly believe in and depend on and hope for. I want a church building to worship while I wait. My choice. His glory. It’s why I go to church.

I don't go to church much any more (Part 2)

I didn't set out to make this all about me, but after all, I can only speak for myself.  
I don't drive.  I never have.  End of story.  Cliff is a good person, a better moral person than I am, honestly.  He overlooks faults in others that I tend to harp on.  He's happy to help someone out who's in a pinch.  
He's not really big, though, on going to church.  He is a believer, but church has always bored him.  If I had nagged and whined, he would have taken me, but as he used to tell me, "I just have two days off work every week, and it's the only time I have to get things done around here."    
He's retired now, and would be content to take me to the church of my choice every Sunday.  He might doze off a time or two, but he wouldn't complain.  So why haven't we gone to church lately?  
It's me, plain and simple.  I have gotten in the habit of not going.  It's easier to stay home in my pajamas.  

The clothes thing used to be a problem with me; you were expected to dress up for church, and I hate dressing up.  That's all changed, though, at least in most of the churches I've been to lately.  

I'm a much better person when I go to church regularly.  I guess I need to be reminded once in awhile not to gossip and complain, and to watch what I say, because the less I go to church, the more gossiping and complaining and fault-finding I do.  It helps to have a group of people to whom you are accountable.  It's also nice to have some people in your life who know you and care about you, who might actually send a card if you are in the hospital.       

A while back Cliff and I visited a couple of local churches.  We saw familiar faces in both of them, and everybody was happy to have us there.  Friendly folks indeed.  The services weren't long and drawn-out; the hymns were ones we knew.  
I don't know why we haven't been back to either of them!  They did everything right and nothing wrong.  These days it's just so easy to let things slide.  


My daughter has something to say on this subject, so I'll now give you her views:
  

I’ve been asked by a few people about why we don’t go to church.  I don’t want to be bored by a church, and many can tend to bore me.  The ones that are fun and exciting are 1) too far away, and 2) start hounding us within 3 visits to work some committee.  I don’t want to leave it all to others, but each time I feel like I’m starting to enjoy church again, someone tells me that it's our turn to work the nursery for a month.  What?  I don’t even HAVE a kid in the nursery.

I enjoy working with kids that age, but at my pace, OK?  I know how it works:  A kid shows a fever, or poops all over their clothes, and we punch in the number so it’s shown over the “stage” for all to see.  Does that parent show up?  Nope.  You keep the infectious kid among the other kids until the service is over, the visiting is done, and most of the parking lot has emptied.

I also adore my weekends.  I work long hours during the week and then have two days off.  They seem so short.  I want to see my parents, haul my girls to different destinations, clean my house, and watch mindless TV.  (NASCAR, anyone?)  I know it sounds petty, but the weekends are so short.

I tell God (several times a week) that I am appreciative of what I have.  I thank him for my family, my friends, and the jobs that my husband and I hold.  I even tell him that I’m sorry I don’t go to church often enough.  He seems to understand.  

Do you have something to say on the subject?  Feel free to use my blog as a sounding board, and remain anonymous or not, it's your choice.  Just be nice.  Be sure and check the comments left on these entries, because people have some things to say there, too.

I don't go to church much any more (Part 1)

This all stems from a conversation that came about on Facebook.  
A local lady put this in her status update:  "I can't keep this in any longer, this morning I was questioned about why I haven't been going to church......but wasn't invited. I knew that I haven't been going but would think an invitation might have been part of their job !!"
This led to quite a long discussion, with various people giving their input.  I told them at the time I'd try doing a blog post about the subject from my own point of view.  This is going to take more than one entry, so I'll start with an old poem that was in a book my mom had when I was growing up.  You see, I want you to know first and foremost that it's my own fault I don't go to church much any more.  We'll move on from there in another entry.  

It Isn't the Church - It's You

If you want to have the kind of a church
Like the kind of church you like,
You needn’t slip your clothes in a grip
And start on a long, long hike,
You’ll only find what you left behind,
For there’s nothing really new.
It’s a knock at yourself when you knock your church;
It isn’t the church-its you.

When everything seems to be going wrong,
And trouble seems everywhere brewing;
When prayer meeting, Young People’s meeting, and all,
Seem simmering slowly-stewing,
Just take a look at yourself and say,
“What’s the use in being blue?”
Are you doing your “bit” to make things “hit”?
It isn’t the church-its you.

It’s really strange sometimes, don’t you know,
That things go as well as they do,
When we thing of the little-the very small mite-
We add to the work of the few.
We sit, and stand round, and complain of what’s done,
And do very little but fuss.
Are we bearing our share of the burdens to bear?
It isn’t the church- it’s us.

So, if you want to have the kind of a church
Like the kind of a church you like,
Put off your guile, and put on your best smile,
And hike, my brother, just hike,
To to the work in hand that has to be done-
The work of saving a few.
It isn’t the church that is wrong, my boy;
It isn’t the church- it’s you.

The entries on this subject may be sporadic... there may only be one more; there might be several.  For this subject only, I am taking guest entries.  If you would like to have your voice heard on this subject, send me an email with your thoughts and I will copy and paste it to my blog.  Let me know if you prefer to remain anonymous.  

I only ask that you keep it courteous and honest.    

Dear Lord, I hope I haven't opened up a can of worms.